City of Ashes, Chapter 7: It got really nice out where I am so I went outside instead of doing this

Look, I could give you a long-ass explanation as to why this is so damn late, but I’m gonna be honest with y’all… I got nothin’.

We last left our gang of fearful leaders as they were exiting the City of Convenient Plot Points, AKA the Silent City, where a whole race of people were just eradicated. I’m not even kidding; every single Silent Brother was just straight-up murdered.

So, on that light note, let the recap begin!

They arrive from the statue that really should have been animated to find a group of adult Shadowhunters waiting outside to respond to the distress call they were just answering.

So like, literally, the adults actually Had It Handled but the Children just couldn’t wait.

“Dead?” Maryse repeated. "What do you mean, they're dead?""I think it's quite clear what he means." A woman in a long gray coat had appeared suddenly at Maryse's side. In the flickering light she looked to Clary like a sort of Edward Gorey caricature [ ... ]

Honestly, sometimes my favourite part about CC's writing is that even she admits to the reader that she's too fucking lazy to come up with an original description so she'll just rely on visual cues and be like, 'idk, make up the rest in your head, do I have to do everything for you? Jeeze'.

This woman turns out to be the Inquisitor (hem, hem) and tells Maryse to send some more Shadowhunters back into the city to be absolutely sure.

Maryse's lips tightened. From what very little Clary had learned about Maryse, she knew that Jace's adoptive mother didn't like being told what to do.

I mean... no you don't. You've met her for a grand total of maybe ten minutes, if I'm being generous. As the Shadowhunters descend into the City, we get this lovely heavy-handed scene between Fairy and a woman who sounds suspiciously like Storm from the X-Men.

The last one in line was the woman with the silver hair. Halfway down the stairs she paused, turned, and looked back--directly at Clary. Her eyes were full of a terrible yearning, as if she longed desperately to tell Clary something. 

Maybe she just had gas or something.

I always wonder how a person really can communicate this sort of emotion with a single look--when I'm writing, I'm often guilty of this kind of writing, too. It's interesting because a lot of these phrases are just things we are so used to reading that when you write it almost feels expected of you to include them, when in reality they make your work seem extra lazy.

WHICH IS WHERE THE EDITOR SHOULD COME IN but I digress.

The scene continues with the Inquisitor (hem, hem) telling them that she knows Valentine is back, complete with Jace rocking some rad makeup:

Jace was very pale, with hectic spots like fever on his cheekbones. 

Idk but it might be a good idea to let him go lie down. Just a thought. Don't let me interrupt this dramatic re-telling of everything we just read, though.

"What else did he tell you? Did he tell you where he was going? What he plans to do with the two Mortal Instruments?" Maryse asked quickly.
Jace shook his head.
The Inquisitor moved toward him, her coat swirling around her like drifting smoke. Her gray eyes and gray mouth were drawn into tight horizontal lines. "I don't believe you."

OKAY WOW. LOTS TO LAUGH ABOUT HERE. First of all, the idea that they wouldn't believe that an evil villain wouldn't just sit and tell his son his master plan is almost so ridiculous it kind of falls into satire? Like, of course he told you what he would do, that's what all villains do. But I honestly don't want to give CC the credit for that.

Second, that's the second time she's described the Inquisitor (hem, hem) in this novel as having something swirl about her like 'smoke'. Again, should have been edited out.

Third, I am straight-up imagining the Inquisitor's (hem, hem) face exactly like this and I invite you to do the same:

the panda in the background makes this gif

"S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse," Jace said in a language Clary didn't know, "a persona che mai tornasse al mondo."
"Dante." The Inquisitor looked dryly amused. "The Inferno. You're not in hell yet, Jonathan Morganstern, though if you insist on lying to the Clave, you'll wish you were."

Why wouldn't Clary immediately pick that out as at least a romance language? I mean, Italian (in the Western world) is actually a pretty highly recognizable language, I think? I could be being really pretentious, but still, I'm not the one quoting Dante.

Just so we're all clear, too, Jace is so pretentious; he's doing that thing where you don't even quote the full text, and you just give someone a line, assuming that they'll fill in the rest. So his speech translates to:

If I thought that my reply were given to anyone who might return to the world

Which is then followed by:

this flame would stand forever still; but since never from this deep place has anyone returned alive, if what I hear is true, without fear of infamy I answer thee.

Which... I have built my entire academic career on tenuously tying quotes to my point and making it work, but this is some next-level shit. The whole poem its from is about over-analyzing and self-doubt, and that doesn't really seem to be Jace's point, here. He's responding to no one believing him, not drowning in a sea of self-doubt?

Jace finally almost faints, so we don't need to further examine any character motivations, which is super lucky for everyone involved! I love not having the plot moved forward!

Anyway, it doesn't matter because the Love of my Life has finally reappeared into this novel and now there are angels singing and glitter is exploding from the sky:

"I thought we could go to Magnus."
[ ... ]
"By all means. Where is he?"
Alec glanced down at the phone in his hand and then back at the thin gray figure in front of him. "He's here," he said. He raised his voice. "Magnus! Magnus, come on out!"

I AM SO HAPPY YOU GUYS. MAGNUS IS BACK. LITERALLY THE ONLY CHARACTER I CARED ABOUT IN THIS WHOLE SERIES.

Anyway, there's some more Umbridge'ing from the Inquisitor, which means she's just being excessively awful, but there's no real reason in this version of her, because we don't know the Inquisitor's character motivations and she's not working for a government and deathly full of ambition. Basically she's just become a weird stock villain. She's even better at being a villain than Valentine, at this point.

"Your warlock does realize," [the Inquisitor] said, "that Jonathan is a witness of utmost importance to the Clave?"
"He's not my warlock." The tops of Alec's angular cheekbones flared a dark red.

Does anyone in this novel not have cheekbones a la Benedict Cumberbatch or....

you're welcome for the nightmares

[Magnus] crossed the lawn gracefully and came to stand over Jace; he was as tall as he was thin, and when Clary glanced up to look at him, she was surprised how many stars he blotted out. 

What does that even mean? 'as tall as he was thin'? I need someone to illustrate that for me because it makes no sense as a descriptor.  Also that stars thing totally sounds like fake deep tumblr poetry.

Magnus, probably.

[Jace] looked up at the warlock, dazed and dizzy. "What are you doing here?"
Magnus grinned down at Jace, and his teeth sparkled like sharpened diamonds.
"Hey, roommate," he said.

Is this book going to become a sitcom where Jace and Magnus live together? Will I never have to see Fairy again if that happens? Because I am 100% onboard for this.

And that's the end of the chapter! I'll see you (probably, lol) next week with Divergent!

Celina